Verschönerung

First fare today ~ lady says she only has two bucks. Okay come on get in what the hell who cares. The next one was a six dollar ride and by the looks of him I didn't expect any tip but I was wrong in fact he reached deep.
C'est la vie say the old folks, it goes to show you never can tell.
Two more short fares both senior citizens ~ ten percent off. Then the big one ~ a forty dollar job to Brockton.
Grabbed a sandwich at Dunkin Donuts ~ bacon, egg and cheese on a wheat bagel. Untoasted. I like to taste the soft bread. Its too crunchy when they toast it. Never toast anything that's what I say.
Back to work. Some college kid after a job interview. People are never so relieved as after being interviewed. What a horrible thing to have to go through. Maybe I'm exaggerating. Followed that up with a 12 dollar run ~ a Hindu dude from the Korean Market to the hotel. I should have been Hindu but its too late now.
A young couple from out of town to the station. Tried to sell them on a "nice quick ride" into town but they didn't go for it. Can't blame a guy for trying.
Sitting there for a minute in the station getting organized etc and a guy walks up ~ wants to go to Brighton. I told him that's fifty bucks flat plus the tolls but that's way to much. Take the train I said, you're right here (subway station) but he took the ride half way. Not everything or everybody makes sense all the time.
Three workers from the Cheesecake Factory ended my day and I was exhausted from not sleeping very well the night before and driving up from the Cape in wicked heavy holiday traffic.
Someone said I seemed deflated.

unspecific fruitlessness

Saturday is always a bust. And that leads to a busted weekend. Getting home from work at 3:00am causes a chain reaction because all I really want to do is sleep all day Saturday. I try very hard not to let that happen. Doing something, any activity will stop a likely slide into depression. I decided to go to a movie ~ picked one that looked interesting. It was playing in Cambridge giving it an added bonus ~ the act of going to the city which is really an activity itself, is it not?

There was horrendous traffic on the expressway and it became apparent that I was never going to make it there in time. That's alright man, the movie was just one idea. There's millions of things to do on a day off.
Through modern technology I came to find out that a friend at work had been fired over a matter of eleven dollars. I guess feelings were hurt and the F bomb started flying ~ it escalated like Vietnam and the jobless rate in Massachusetts increased by another fraction.
I started to think maybe I should go over there and drive a cab for a shift. Some extra cash, maybe a few laughs and in the process try to smooth things out between my terminated friend and our detestable employer. I hung around the office for a while but business seemed slow ~ instead of a taxi I got back in my own car. Still without a plan drove around town a bit digging the sunshine and the music on the radio. Sat idly in a parking lot facing the street and the tracks watching cars and trains, generally feeling good at least about being out of the apartment. Watching the world. Watching the wheels go 'round and 'round and sipping my iced coffee.

I rung up my recently dismissed cohort and we decided to go to a movie after all. He vented some frustration which is cool ~ I like to listen. It's a hobby.
The movie sucked.
I went home, cooked up some supper and watched Little Miss Sunshine on cable (Don't apologize Olive, it's a sign of weakness)
Well, what am I supposed to do now? Goodnight and thanks for reading my continuing non-adventures.

dad

Drinking some Gatorade and thinking about my Dad in the hospital. He had a knee replacement on Wednesday and for some reason they can't give him as much morphine as necessary because of something to do with the anesthesia. I hope he's comfortable and sleeping. I hope they start cranking up the pain stuff. Looking forward to seeing him Sunday at the rehab hosp.

It is now 24 hours later and Pops is doing much better.

trying to smile

Went to work today like I always do, like I have since my first paper route in the 5th grade. My work has always been menial. Nothing of great importance to society. The world would have been just fine without me but I kept going back to the warehouse, the sub shop, the lumber yard, the taxi yard. Almost every day. Almost always on time. I'll never be able to retire because I've never made enough money to be able to save any of it. Just enough to live. That's my fault. I think I'm probably intelligent enough to have had some sort of 'career' as so many millions have and will but maybe I lacked something else. Some competitiveness. Assertiveness. Such wonderful qualities.
I love driving a cab because it lets me meet people I never would have met otherwise. I've talked about this before but its on my mind. I stay at this company because its what I know how to do.
I'm not built for the brand of negativity that permeates the dim lit offices of my company and its tearing my soul and my mind apart.
The company has taken on the paranoid personality of its owner.
Today, there it was again. The negativity. It feels like a living thing. It feeds on fear. I wanted to run but I walked to my car and went home. Just for a few hours. I have to go back in a while.
I'll shut up now.
Some people have 'real' problems.

6,777,126,643 (people on the planet)

You should hear the messages my boss left on my voice mail the other night. He was drunk and he was saying how mad he was at me. I was called things that I'm pretty sure I've never been called before. Terrible crazy things. Well, I learned a long time ago not to pay any attention to anything he says.
In reality, this man is mad at himself. His soul is mad. He's getting crazier with each passing day. The butter is slipping off of the noodles.
I wish him, and everyone in the world, peace and loving kindness.
I'm going to begin working every other Saturday night to help boost my economy. It sucks because I truly like my weekends but I'm gonna get myself a vacation this Summer. Somehow, some way. You'll see.

Happy Birthday BFD